Holiday Episode 5: The Boss

SPEAKER_03 0:00

What's going on, y'all, and welcome to the Learnins and Missteps podcast, where we highlight the men and women that have made careers in the construction and maintenance industries.

SPEAKER_01 0:10

Hey, Jesse, can you tell me a little bit about this holiday episode?

SPEAKER_03 0:14

Yes, Ernest. This holiday episode, we showcase your poem titled The Boss, which is about our dad, and we talk about the complexities of our relationship with the old dude. Um, there's also a bonus poem at the end penned by you as well. Hope our listeners are moved and stimulated to reach out to that person over these holidays, that hard, gruff person in their life, and let them know that you care about them. They need hugs too. So you ready to go? Let's do it. Background on why we wanted to talk about your poem, Ernest, is because both of y'all, Renee, probably don't know this, but I can't read that poem without getting a frog in my throat and tears in my eyes. Um, it's very moving and it does a man, it does an excellent job of evoking like special delicate feelings I have of the old man, dad. So much so that I've always had that poem at my office on the wall, where it's ever wherever I'm officing out of, right? Wow. Uh, because it it's really it's very meaningful to me to hear the idea, to read the idea. And so it's meaningful in two ways that it reminds me of the special sweet times with that, because you like I said, you captured it so well. Like I remember that. I remember that feeling of just amazement, the feeling of son of a gun, are we ever gonna take a break? And and then it also makes me feel like I want to be remembered that way, you know, like it it does, it does it makes me feel all kinds of ways, right? And you one of your superpowers, your special talents, is writing. Like you do, you've always been a phenomenal writer, and I'm pretty sure our listeners may not know this, but the writings that are posted when we release an episode are done by you, um, the silver-tongued devil, also known as La Vos. Um, right, because I I don't think Renee and I have that skill set. Renee, would you agree?

SPEAKER_00 2:48

Yeah, I would agree.

SPEAKER_03 2:50

And you can capture the spirit of the episode in a very concise manner that that really is respectful of the episode and the topic on the guests on the episode. And again, I mean it's it's uh it's a superpower, so we don't have to tease our audience much longer. Ernest, can you tell us like the impetus of that poem? This poem specifically? Sure.

SPEAKER_01 3:22

So this poem is called The Boss, and when it was written, I was volunteering heavily with an organization called Sananto Cultural Arts, which is a community organization that does arts and working with the youth in the west side, and they were having a Huevos Rancheros Gala fundraiser, and they were accepting donations for their raffle. And I wanted to contribute something, and this organization had already published several poems of mine that heard words that I would consider Pachuco, and so I thought, well, let me write a collection of Pachuco poems for the raffle giveaway at the fundraising gala. And so when I looked in that Pachuco data bank of words, I realized that hey, a lot of these memories are from my youth, especially tied to my father. And this concept of the boss was one of those memories that I drew forth the inspiration for the Pope.

SPEAKER_03 4:28

So a lot of our listeners, I mean, we've got listeners, I don't know if y'all know this, but we're we're global now, baby. The learnings and missteps podcast has global listeners. Watch out. We've got we got a bunch of listeners in Canada, we got a couple of listeners in Russia, and then we got India, New Zealand, Australia, Germany, and of course, a whole bunch of listeners here in the states. And I'm wondering if they would know what Pachuco means or what that's so can you give us some background on Pachucos?

SPEAKER_01 5:13

Sure. Pachuco is a culture, and it's more of a subset of a culture within Hispanic or Mexican-American communities. There are some purists who would argue that you could only be Pachuco if you're from Los Angeles, or that if you only dress a certain way, or or that if you only use a specific certain dialect, but according to my father, his culture is Pachuco in his community, and they have their own interpretation of that, which does include some of those other things. Um, but one of the things that I remember most fondly from my father's rendition of Pachuco is the language. So in the language, there's words like a la chamber and uh Simon and Chale, Chale Carnalismo, yeah, and so that so the so when I built this poem, the boss I took one of those words, which was jefito, and built the poem around it.

SPEAKER_03 6:34

Yeah, I remember I remember Theoneto, and I oh, I'll never forget, right? The smell of tres flores in the morning. So tres flores is a pomade, um, and I I still use it to this day. Um, I remember the Stacy Adams, man. I'll never forget. I love the Stacy Adams, and and along with the language that you pointed out, that is uh, I guess a component that for me still I still kind of loosely want to represent and keep that piece of culture alive, yes, right? Maybe silently through my through my Stacy Adams.

SPEAKER_01 7:16

Exactly, exactly. So and I I'd like to add that the word jefito itself is not pachuko. In this context, it's more about the way the word is said that that ties that ties to that. So awesome.

SPEAKER_03 7:34

So Renee, what do you think? Should we just jump into the poem now?

SPEAKER_00 7:38

Yeah, and I mean let's let's read the poem. I want to see you cry.

SPEAKER_03 7:42

Oh, you don't think my tear ducks work, huh?

SPEAKER_01 7:48

Okay, you ready?

SPEAKER_03 7:50

Let's do it.

SPEAKER_01 7:51

The boss the sun is setting on my boss's hands, mi jefito. The sun is setting on my father's hands, mi jefito. I remember when the sun was rising two hours after we awoke, where I'd learned the value of a dollar and a fraction of how to be a man. I remember the breakfast you made without a mom and a little trailer that housed a man, a company, and me. That looking back, I realized was also my home. I remember the nights worked till the moon wasn't strong enough to see us through till morning, but the job never stopped until it was finished. That looking back, I realized it was a blessing, not a hardship. Jefito, the work never stopped, you never stopped, the sun never stopped, but still it's setting. My filero is tucked away, my bandana is folded in the corner of my drawer. But still, Jefito, I remember when you taught me how to be a man. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 9:12

Oh, that's a good one. But it already read it. It was that was cool, man. I really liked that. I really liked it. I found myself saying, like, yeah, I'm Jeffito right now. Gangster!

SPEAKER_01 9:27

Oh, tell yeah, tell me more about that.

SPEAKER_00 9:31

You know, that part. What was the part? Can you read it again? The part where you said uh something about the the the sun never stops, and uh the in the morning where you make you made the breakfast without a mom or something like that.

SPEAKER_01 9:45

Oh, I remember when the sun was rising two hours after we awoke.

SPEAKER_00 9:51

Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I really I really relate to that one because that's that's what I do. I wake up at 4 30 in the morning. I mean, I don't work till 7, but I wake up at 4 30 so I can go to the gym. That way, when I get home, uh I'm I'm at home. You know, I'm at home with my kids and my wife, and I'm present and I'm not going to the gym. So, and this is this is what I do when I wake up that the sun's not out yet, you know what I mean? And by the time I got my uniform on, then you know the sun starts rising. You know, I can relate to that, you know, waking up before the the sun even rises.

SPEAKER_01 10:33

Yeah, to get things done.

SPEAKER_03 10:35

Yeah, and and with with with Chewy, it was waking up at four in the morning to get there, wasn't it? Right? It was let's pack up some food, let's make some coffee, and let's hit the road. Like it was it was straight up work, period. And I man, I remember that the the little trailer, right? He had this little trailer that he lived in, and um this is way back in the day. And man, in the winter times, it was cold, cold, cold, right? Like you get up and he smelt that coffee, some tacos, right? He he he'd throw down, like he'd make his own homemade tortillas and pack it up and load the truck up, get all the tools, material, whatever, and then and orale, let's go, let's hit the road. It was, you know, as a youngster, it was not the most comfortable situation, but it it's a very special memory I have of just kind of like, man, every single day this dude does this, it doesn't complain, just like a machine, man.

SPEAKER_02 11:43

Yeah, right?

SPEAKER_03 11:44

Like he just he just got down like nobody, like nobody before. And I'm glad that that it resonates with you, Renee, because that's you know, part of the reason I want really wanted to share this, because you know, the holidays are coming up, you know. Believe it or not, I do get sentimental, right? It's cooler weather, and and I think about I think about him, right? I see him, and he's he's older, he's shrinking, right? He used to be this big giant, now he's kind of a little looks like a little raisin man, it's getting smaller, and you know. But it it reminds me of of younger days to to think about them and think about those things. So, Ernest, how how much feeling did you have to tap into when you were authoring this poem?

SPEAKER_01 12:40

Oh wow, that's a great question. So the the short answer is more than I would have liked to. So it would have been nice if I had this pure memory of this pure color and just put it on the paper. But from my memories of dad, is he was a conflicted man, and and there were some memories of him that that I think are hurtful, and so to write this poem was really very difficult because there is a pure, beautiful part of the memory of my father, and in order to write this poem, I needed to kind of separate myself from some of those other feelings so so that it didn't it didn't destroy the purity of this aspect because because this memory and what this memory represents and the feelings that it generates, and actually, really the things that I carry forth into my life from this memory are pure and beautiful, and so it was it was it was easy to tap into those things, but it was really hard to separate from some other things, and that brother, the feeling is mutual, right?

SPEAKER_03 14:00

You know, I I think everybody has um a complicated relationship with their parents, or maybe maybe not, I don't know. But for me, I think everybody does. It makes me feel better about myself when I can say everybody does, but you know, conflicted man is a perfect description, right? And and and more so, I think like that would that's a great way of describing me too. Now, right? Yeah, go ahead.

SPEAKER_00 14:32

So you say conflicted. So uh what was what was so conflicting about him? Ernest?

SPEAKER_01 14:40

Yes. So so the the the work was beautiful, and the lessons that I got from that were so some of the things were like uh the concept of being able to earn a living or the value of work or the value of working hard. But one example I have is like the method of how those lessons were taught. So, for example, if he wanted a tool and he wanted me to look for it, and he says it's in the toolbox, but I can't find it. Well, he's gonna and he I go tell him, Hey dad, I can't find this. He's gonna get the toolbox, throw it all over the floor, and uh like well, there it is. Like, don't you see? And so that's one example, which was the method, I guess kind of the method of how these lessons were taught. But there were there were also other examples of in the personal life. So, for example, I would have liked to spend more time with my dad outside of work, uh, I would have liked for him to come to some of my baseball games, or I would have liked for him to show up regularly at a scheduled time or when he when he said he would. And so some of those things left wounds in me that are hurtful that I say conflicted because while things with the work side were very, very good, things on the personal side I think could have used some improvement.

SPEAKER_03 16:14

You know, it's interesting. I I never thought of it in that context, but it would work was really the only venue we had to spend time with dad. How far how far off base am I with that statement, Ernest?

SPEAKER_01 16:34

Uh I think it's uh not not very far off, because I think other time could have been created. I I think it just I think it just wasn't I think it was his choice not to tap into it for whatever reason.

SPEAKER_03 16:51

Right, right, right. Yeah, no, exact exactly, right? Like we all have an option, we all have choices, we can all create our environment and our reality. But with with with the dad, it was through work that we could spend time together, and there there really wasn't there wasn't another way made available. And you know, I I probably not probably at just thinking about this right now, I have the same problem, right? Like it's work, and and there are very few things that I will put before work. And I think there's a lot of people out there, fathers and children of fathers that that struggle with that, right? And and and that's part of their reality that you know that I'd love to spend more time with the old man, but the old man's working, and and it's accepted, right? Do you think that's still a like a real thing for a lot of people?

SPEAKER_02 17:54

Oh yeah, oh yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_00 17:56

Yeah, like like my foreman, he says, because sometimes sometimes I'll turn down uh overtime. Um, so I because we have something planned with my wife or and or my kids, and sometimes I'll turn down overtime, or I'll say, like, hey, I'm not like we'll be on a holiday week and we get off at 3 30, but the option is open to work all the way till 5 30, and you'll get two hours overtime. So I'll turn that down, and uh, you know, my foreman has a saying that goes, a man's gotta work, a man's gotta work, right? That's that's the that's the crew culture that we got. A man's gotta work no matter what, always making that money. Uh, you get the overtime when it comes, right? I say, you know, no, not not all the time, you know, especially if you had something with your kids. And I will I just learned this lesson that I I I haven't been like this always, you know. I remember when I was uh I was doing boxing, I was uh boxing at San Fernando Gym. That was my second job almost, you know. I wanted it to be my second job, I wanted to make money off of fighting eventually. So what I was doing is I would go to work, you know, 40 hours plus whatever overtime we got, and then right after work, go to the boxing gym and box for three hours and then go home, you know? And geez, that's that's a lot of hours away from your family, you know. And uh I I was just it I had that mentality in my head that uh man's gotta work, a man's gotta work, I'm doing this for our future, I'm doing this so we can have uh, you know, I can give uh if I can give my family a better life, potentially, you know what I mean? I mean, boxers make millions. Um, maybe this will pay off, right? And after talking to my wife and seeing, you know, the fruits or the lack of fruits in my family, I was like, man, you know what? I I I can't be doing this. You know, what does it matter if I did make it and my family wasn't with me the whole time, or or my family has no desire to be with me anymore because I've I've been putting them on the back burner my whole life. You know, and I just realized that you know, probably about last year.

SPEAKER_01 20:17

It gets to the point of what am I working for? Yeah, what is like what is what is all this work for? Exactly.

SPEAKER_03 20:24

I think um Tony Montana said it best. Is this it? Is this what I've been working for?

SPEAKER_01 20:35

Uh I know the rest of that quote, right?

SPEAKER_03 20:39

Right, I I could keep going, but we're gonna try to keep this PG. You brought up a fantastic point, right? And uh, Renee, you brought up a fantastic point, and Ernest, your poem captures it beautifully. So, Renee, what I got got from what you're saying is we get in this mindset that I gotta work so I can give my family the things that they need, give them a better life.

SPEAKER_02 21:06

Right.

SPEAKER_03 21:07

I think that mindset is rooted in buying them things and providing them more comforts.

SPEAKER_00 21:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:16

And really what our family, what our people need, the people we care about most, is the lessons, the learnings, the understandings, and the connections. And and but it it that's a very hard concept to really understand and and and develop. And it sounds like, of course, because you just have that way about you, Renee, that you're you've got some wisdom beyond your years, and you learn those things super fast. But as it relates to the poem, like when I read it, Ernest, I think about hard work, right? I think about what a hard worker looks like, I think about commitments. Not giving up, right? Perseverance, pushing through, finishing a job, a job well done. Like all of those lessons are, I mean, invaluable.

SPEAKER_01 22:11

Right. So one of one of my fondest memories that this poem evokes is the image of my father's hands. Because I remember back in the day when I was working in construction, and we would shake hands, it was like sandpaper, yeah like hand-to-hand sandpaper. And his hands were hard. His hands were hard and they were massive, and they had stains of glue, pipe glue, and pipe cleaner. And it was just amazing to imagine like all of the things that these hands would build. Kind of as a as a certificate of this is where I came from, or this is what I this is what I can do. And so that's that that that imagery when I when I hear this poem, that's one of the images that comes to my mind, the the hands.

SPEAKER_03 23:19

Oh wow. Yeah, that's that's real talk right there, baby. Yeah, you know, I remember looking at his hands, and this might sound weird, but looking at the depth in his fingerprints, like they were valleys, peaks and valleys in his fingerprints, right? Like it was a whole landscape almost of his experience and toughness and and and ability to push through the discomfort, right? Like for with Chewy, there was no such thing as discomfort, right? I don't I can't ever remember hearing him say, like, oh man, I wish I had air conditioned, or I wish it wasn't so hot. It was just like ponle, let's go. Like, yeah, this is it, this is the way it is. Yeah, um, and his hands, man, yeah, absolutely. They wow, wow, that that brings back that's taking me back, boy. I'm hoping that our listeners are gonna be able to, this is gonna trigger a memory for them, right? Of that family member that's a trade person, or they themselves are trades workers, um, and how meaningful the the unscripted moments are and the impact, right, that it it has on people's lives. You know, I keep and I'm thinking right now, I'm like, man, I keep calling them different names. I'll call them dad, I'll call them Chewy, the old man, and and it was, you know, we really had a different relationship, right? Because we worked with him on the job sites, and I don't know, Ernest, if you remember this, but I remember him telling me, like, okay, we're going to work, and at work, I'm not dad. At work, I'm Chewy.

SPEAKER_01 25:06

I remember that, right? I remember something, yeah. I remember that.

SPEAKER_03 25:10

And so call him Chewy, right? And and it was like that was kind of a signal, another one of those signals that said, There's no comfort here.

SPEAKER_01 25:24

Like, we're gonna work and you're doing work. That's no, there's he used to have this saying, uh, Aki no I mommies. Oh, yeah, and uh it probably meant too Aki no I puppies, like we're we're just getting the job done, like that's how we're doing, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 25:43

Aki no I mommies, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:45

What does that mean to you, Renee? Aki no I mommies, that means like here there's no moms, right? Yep, there's no moms, like there's not nobody's gonna mother you, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:56

I've heard that too. I've heard that as well.

SPEAKER_03 26:01

Oh yeah, yeah, man. That was um that was some, you know, that was some reality, right? Like I think about it now, and yeah, there ain't no mommies around. You gotta you gotta take care of yourself, you gotta handle your business. That again, the lessons, the lessons that that that impressed upon me. Um wow, wow. Okay, you know, so Chewie's worked a lot, right? He's a plumber, so I'm a second generation plumber, and he's he's been very impactful in many, many people's lives. And uh, you know, I'll I'll share a couple of memories. There was when I right out of high school, I think it was like the second job site I was on. I was working for Jack Lawrence, right? I was an apprentice, helpers, and um and I worked with this one guy, I can't even remember his name, super cool dude. Uh, and he would always kind of look at me like like he knew me. And like, bro, you're old, man. You don't know me. Um, and then one day I think we went to lunch, and he's like, Your name's Jesus, because I go by Jesse. He's like, Yeah, yeah, Hernandez is, yeah. He's like, Is your dad Chewy? Right, and to me, I'm like, Well, of course, Jesus is Jesse, Jesse's Chewy. And he's like, No, no, no, he's the plumber, the silver fox. You know the silver fox, because that dad used to call himself or his truck, right? He had an old silver pickup that he called the silver fox, like back in the day, right?

SPEAKER_02 27:38

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 27:40

And I'm like, Yeah, man, yeah, that's my dad. And this dude tells me, Man, you're lucky that I didn't know that when we first met. And I said, Okay, like, what's up? You know, you want to throw down? He's like, He said, No, man. He's like, you know, your dad, he was hard. He was hard to work with, and he would run helpers out of the business. So if anybody had a helper that that was that would dog it and drag, and you know, that they needed to get rid of or wanted to get rid of, they would put them with your dad. He's like, and he's that I was one of those helpers, and I always promised that I would get even with his ass. And and I will, if I'd have known you were his son, I would have, I would have made you quit just to get even with him. And so that's a testament to like the the conflicting the the conflict within the the sentiment of the poem, right? Because he did have man, it was hard. It was it was hard. It was um, I mean, we were little kids, and I say little, what, eight, nine, ten years old? Ernest.

SPEAKER_01 28:54

And it wasn't just our perception, it was that's the way it was.

SPEAKER_03 28:58

Yeah, yeah, that's the way it was. Eight, nine, ten years old, and he'd say, Okay, go go get me the the channel locks or the vice grips or something. And so me and Ernest would go to the truck, we and you couldn't ask, like, what's that, right? You just like somehow omnisciently knew because you had a bean in shistaco, every stupid tool in the world. And we would go to the toolbox and and grab a tool, like, okay, you take this one, I'll take that one. And hopefully, we right, hopefully, we'll get it right. And then we would get in trouble, right? Like, ah, chingao, parecen ninjas, parecen huercas, like y'all are like little girls, you know. Yeah, and man, it was it was not pleasant. Um, but there was a valuable lesson in that. Um, and then other people, you know, he's he like I said, he's been in the in the industry here in San Antonio for a very long time. Um, and he also traveled overseas uh and worked overseas for man a good chunk of years, right? And and I've met people, and you know, I guess this this will this will complement, right? The the value of maturity and growing and and learning. Um, because he was very difficult. Uh but in his later years, he became more of a teacher, uh, and he would counsel and and develop people. And you know, I've met people when he was working overseas, he was kind of in that mode of his life of of teaching people and and almost I dare I say nurturing, right? Um, but I've met people that uh that say, Man, I you know, I work with your dad, I met him in Saudi Arabia, and man, that dude, like everybody knows him down there. Um he man, he's awesome. You're so lucky to have him. And I'm like, shut your mouth, fool. You don't even know. Yeah, you know when did that happen? Exactly, right? Like, you talking about the same dude, the silver fox? Are you sure? Um, you know, I worked with him, he helped me get my first job out of high school, right? Because when we were little, we would work with dad, but it was on side jobs, little jobs that he picked up, you know, repairs and and new homes and different things. And right out of high school, he helped me get my first job in commercial construction. And I remember him, he had a helper, Andrew, and I was helping somebody else because that was the deal. Dad said, I'll get you the job, but we're not gonna work together, you're gonna work with somebody else. It's like, okay, cool. And man, he was teaching Andrew. Like, no, no, no, this is how you how you his the guy's name was Andrew. How telling is it that I still remember that guy's name, right? Yeah, and he's showing him how to read a measuring tape, and he's showing them how to you know hold the hammer drilled, and he's teaching him, and I'm looking at him like, what the hell, bro? Like, what happened to me? Why didn't you do that with me? Why didn't you do that with us? Uh but it's what it is, right? It's that it's what it is. We we learn and we grow, we mature over the years. Um Ernest, did you ever look forward to holding the flashlight for him? No, no, why not?

SPEAKER_01 32:24

It was just so at that time, I guess I didn't understand maybe like how significant it was to hold the flashlight exactly where it was. So if I got a little bit distracted, or if my arm got tired, it was like, oh, the end of the world, you you move the light, and like it was just it was bad. Like it was it was it was um it it wasn't like a small correction, uh uh uh hey Miho put the flesh light. Uh like it wasn't uh uh like a like a nurturing correction, it was uh like a violent shift of the rudder. It was just oh, it was so hard.

SPEAKER_03 33:09

Violent shift of the rudder, yeah, man. And I you know, I've seen some memes about that, right? Like I got I got my training by holding the light for dad, and and everybody knows what that means, right? Like, oh shit, you got your ass chewed because you moved the light for like a half second and they ended the world, man. It was it was uh it was a thing, and you know, like it's not just dad, and there's I don't know if it's a generational thing, maybe it's probably a combination of generation and just the the the his background, right? How he was brought up, how he just lived life on a daily basis. But I I mean, and everybody says it, but I mean it when I say this, like that dude could work.

SPEAKER_01 33:57

Oh yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 33:58

Like, like when I think about a hard working son of a gun, it's always him. And people always tell me the people that have worked with them, they're like, Hey man, have you talked to your dad? Is he still out there? Like, and I'm like, Yeah, he's still out there. Like, man, that dude, like, he's never gonna stop. He's never he never stops. I'm like, I know, it was you know, it's kind of one of the things that motivated me to learn to or expand my knowledge, right? Is because yes, dad was a hard-working animal, right? He was a beast, but he did it all the time. And and I'm like, man, I don't I I can't hang like that. I ain't got what he's got, right? He's got them ghana's like gondas, gunners. Um, and one time it was one of the jobs where like real early, my very one of the very first times where I was running a crew or responsible for organizing the crew and getting the work done for this one job. And we had received a load of cast iron pipe, right? Two, three, and four-inch cast iron, they're all 10-foot lengths and varying weights, right? And we were working in a hospital, and it was an occupied hospital, and we had to, for a bunch of reasons, we ended up having to carry the pipe up the stairwell. So we were working like on the sixth floor, and so it was like, oh man, this is gonna suck because now we got to hump all this pipe up to the sixth floor, come back down, and just keep like that. It was at least a day's worth of work. It ended up being less than a day, and so we were out there, we received it. It was me, Chewy, um, another guy who had just recently got his plumbing license, and a couple other dudes, right? It's like, man, all right, let's well, let's go, let's get it going. And the one guy who just got his license, like, he was young, right? I mean, I was 21, maybe, uh 22, and and this dude, the other guy, he was probably in his early 30s, uh, but he had his license. Like, oh, he's he's he's special. And old boy says, he's like, Look, man, I ain't carrying that pipe up the stairwell. I didn't get that license for nothing. And I'm not a helper, right? Like this, um, what's the word? Uh privilege. Not the well, privilege is a nice way of saying it. Entitlement.

SPEAKER_00 36:24

Ah, right.

SPEAKER_03 36:25

He was entitled to not do that kind of work because he was a licensed plumber. And so Chewy pulls out his license, which is like a double-digit number because he's had his license for from the beginning of time, right? And he's a master plumber, and he shows he says, Look at this, like, that's cute. Look at this. He puts the license in the guy's face, puts it back in his wallet, grabs two sticks of four-inch cast iron, and hauls ass up the stairs. And I was just like, and mic dropped, bro. That's like, damn, that was bad. Like, and he didn't talk smack about it afterwards. He chewy just did it, and the rest of us said, Okay, we know what we're supposed to do, and not a word was said about it ever again after that, but everybody knew we're here to work, and everybody needs to do their part, right? And people of that generation, and it came up the way that they he came up, that's just how they work, right? Like, he didn't he wasn't worried about, well, you know, this is unfair, and uh like poor planning, the company should really provide us different means and methods, and he just said, Let's get the damn pipe upstairs and let's go, let's let's do it. Um, and he just kept rolling, he just kept, anyways. It's one of those times where it's like, son of a gun, I want to be like that when I grow up, maybe maybe 60% of that, right? Because I also want to be lazy and and be comfortable and chill out. So, you know, it's what are we the middle of November right now? Y'all are both in San Antonio, I'm in Houston. The holidays are upon us, and and that's that's also another one of the drivers behind why I wanted to record this episode, you know, because the holidays are here, and it is a a time for for family and sentiment and memories. Um, and like I said, Ernest, the that this this poem, man, it's powerful, it's move and I don't know. I've I have I ever told you that before?

SPEAKER_01 38:43

Not to this degree. Uh so you have you have mentioned this.

SPEAKER_03 38:49

Um like it it affects me big time. Um and I hope that for our listeners, if you haven't talked to that old man or or or it could be your mom, right, or your aunt or an uncle, you know, that person in your life that you know they were bristly and rough, but you have fond memories of them. I hope that this triggers you to think deeply about them, or if you're feeling courageous, reaching out to them uh and saying, Hey, you doing all right? You want some coffee? How about you make me some tortillas? I'll eat your breakfast. Like I get out there and contact them and or celebrate them. How about that? That's probably a little easier. Celebrate those people because you know, we talked a little bit about how there was hurt associated with those, or not associated, how there was hurt experienced in those situations. Um, but there was also tremendous life values that we've we've both, I think, taken forward and and attempted to impart to Renee. Uh, what do you think, Renee?

SPEAKER_00 40:04

I think um, what was your question? You're asleep. Now I fell asleep.

SPEAKER_03 40:14

Thinking about you know the work ethic that Chewie imparted on us. Did did he or we impart any of that on you?

SPEAKER_00 40:24

Oh that's a good one. I can't recall ever either one of you being giving me a violent shift of the rudder. I can't remember, I I remember you guys teaching me everything you guys taught me. Um, you know, nerd in a nurturing way. It was it was never hardcore, you know. I don't I can't recall anything like that. And then even with even when I was working at TD and I was doing the uh the uh sheet metal and Chewy was working on that same job site, uh, and he would pick me up. Uh I don't even remember Chewy being that way either. You know, he was really nice to me, like the Chewy that you guys describe. I can't even imagine him doing like that. I remember him coming to my mom's house to pick me up, and he drove, I mean, far. I mean, it was at least a 20-minute drive to come pick me up, and then he would have tacos for me. He would always have a napalin egg taco, and then like some kind of egg ranchera taco, or you know, he would give them to me, and he'd be like, Hey, well, you can warm him up on the the heater of the D AC. You know, he was nice, he was a nice guy, you know. And he would give me some work ethic talks and stuff, and but it was never hardcore, you know. Like, I don't know if that answers your question.

SPEAKER_03 41:51

Yeah, man. No, that's that's actually that's really nice to to know that you have that experience with them being chichooy. I'm gonna have to give them shit. No, that's I mean, it's it's that's special because it's for me, it's special because it gives me hope that I too can be nurturing, right? Like I don't always have to be uh porcupine and um in my intention because it it it it takes a lot, I think, for some people to understand that I'm coming from uh my intention is to help and develop anything, but the delivery may sting. So there's still hope out there. There's hope for me anyways. So Ernest, you got uh any anything else you want to add or share?

SPEAKER_01 42:48

There was one uh important thing. So when I when I was trying to draw the image of the sun and saying that the sun is setting, like he never stopped. The the sun is but the the sun's still going, but the the sun is setting. What I was trying to talk about was the age that my father was at. Because like the sun, the sun is still going strong, even when it's setting, it's still there doing its job. Like it's still there doing work, but hey, the sun is setting. And so I saw my father in the same way that he's still going, he's he's still doing his work, but it's that time where where the sun is setting, and this is the way I want to remember him.

SPEAKER_03 43:40

Yeah, yeah, man. Powerful, powerful story, dude. Uh what other what other poems were in this Pachuco series?

SPEAKER_01 43:49

Uh, so there's actually 10 poems in this series. Uh the other most famous, my favorite poem in this collection is. Called Pachuco Yu. And it's about a kid who grew up in a Pachuco culture, but he feels the need to go to college. And so he's talking to a representative of the school, and there's a repeating line that says, and uh it goes from there. And what he does is he ties in little things from his life. Like he may not have been involved in student organizations, but he had some other substitute experience. But he has this other thing to kind of mirror. So it was like using the mirror of this kid to say, hey, I really do qualify, but like you're not you're not gonna give me a chance. So it was kind of like that. So that was that was that was one of the poems that it was that was probably my favorite poem. And my other favorite poem was about my grandma. And in that one, I say hefita. That that's that that's the the main word, and that poem was written to try to connect and remember to my grand grandparents, who I was never really close to.

SPEAKER_03 45:22

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 45:23

And at the age when they were available, I didn't realize or recognize the value of a family. And so when I wrote this poem, I was trying to connect to that very, very serious need.

SPEAKER_03 45:38

Well, I'll tell you what, rather than tease our audience, why don't we further share your med your superpower? And would you mind reading Pachuko you? Because I think it's I think it's gonna uh strike a chord with our listeners.

SPEAKER_01 45:58

Sure, sure. Okay, you ready?

SPEAKER_03 46:01

Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_01 46:02

Okay, Pachuko Yu. I want to go to college too. West Side Badio Kings, South Side Gangsters. Those were my student organizations. How could you not see? Do you assume too much? I wish, I need, I dream, I deserve to go to college too. Watchia, academic dean. I wish I could go to college too. Gang warpher arbitration, ancient street dialects, those were my advanced placement classes. How can you tell me no que este que el otro are some prerequisites? What about your prerequisite? Your duty to higher education, or do you pull up the ladder so the pachuco doesn't exceed your current occupation? Chingao, academic dean. I need to go to college too. I convinced drug pushers not to sell to kids, move violence away from senior citizens. Those were my community service hours. Tu no saves, Chavez, Academic Dean. I dream of going to college too. This teardrop tattoo, this tiger inked on my chest, rooster placasso on my back. Those were the transcripts of my grade point average. Nobody came to my wood or body shop class, and that college night? Well hell, I had to work to support my family at night. I deserve to go to college too. All the probation officers told the judge I did good. Those were my letters of recommendation. You say I wouldn't even be able to pay, but you told the straight A students there was millions of dollars available in financial aid. What's that you say? All the seats are full. I have to try again next semester. Academic Dean, I want, I wish, I need, I dream, I deserve to go to college too. Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 48:33

Man, that's like fire, baby.

SPEAKER_02 48:35

That's fire.

SPEAKER_00 48:38

Oh, damn it.

SPEAKER_03 48:41

What do you think, Renee?

SPEAKER_00 48:43

Shoot, that's that's good, man. That's good. That's that's kind of like that's exactly what some of the conversations I have with with uh my foreman are, you know, where he's he's uh super, he's like an advocate for for getting these these kids out the barrio, you know. He uh we were talking about um homelessness or something, or or uh low income. I don't remember what we were talking about, but anyway, he was talking about he's like, Yeah, I don't mind giving money. Uh I I give so much a year to this uh this club, and I donated dance shoes to this dance studio because I don't want these kids out here to just survive. I want them to thrive. Yeah, you know, I don't want them to, I want them to have a positive outlet, and and maybe that'll spark something and they can get a dance scholarship or something, you know. So we we have these conversations too, and and you just you just put it all together in one beautiful poem. It it's cool. I mean, there's there's a lot of people that are are talking about that stuff.

SPEAKER_03 49:49

What it says to me is our lives, the richness of our experiences may not be um typical, but they are tremendous, there is tremendous knowledge gained through every walk of life. And within that, there is potential built in the individual that they can contribute to their families and their communities. Many times it's overlooked, um, and we're missing out. And so we need to invest in all of those people and and support the direction, their their learning path, whatever that may be, right? Like college is called out specifically, and that's that's a powerful vehicle, right, for people to to grow and develop and and build a career, but it's not the only vehicle to to learning and developing and growing as an individual. And in any case, either any of the vehicles would be missed if we don't appreciate or if we can't appreciate the real deep, meaningful life lessons that every human being has out there today. What do you think, Ernest?

SPEAKER_01 51:09

I agree, I agree, yeah. Because not not maybe perhaps not everybody's experience is the same, but the value of the experience transcends all those things.

SPEAKER_03 51:22

Damn, there it is again. You heard it from La Vos. Uh, and and for our listeners out there, maybe that may maybe you don't know, but Renee, Ernest, and I we're all brothers. Um, and Ernest, I'm really proud to share this episode. Um, and to hear the passion and the fire you got in in your writing. And I wanted other people to know that you're pretty badass, man. Thanks. This is freaking awesome. So, man, thank you for for letting us record it and for our audience. Thank you for you know hearing us whine a little bit about the old man, right? Dad hurt my feelings. Um and again, it's the holidays, so celebrate your people, right? Und think of try to can look at things from their perspective. Uh, because I'm pretty sure they're not trying to be mean and hurt your feelings. Um, they really are trying to do something else, and they just they don't have the words to express it in the way, in the most comforting way. And so celebrate them. Hell, listen to this episode with them, and we'll talk at y'all next time. Well, that's the end of this episode. Thank you for being gracious and sharing your time with us. We ask that you show us some love on social media, give us some honest, actionable feedback. Uh, help us understand if we're headed in the right direction and providing an entertaining and insightful experience for you. You can also give us that feedback uh directly via email at jessie at learningsand missteps.com. So thanks again. Be cool, and we'll talk at you next time.