Oct. 30, 2025

How to Clear the Chaos (and Your Mind) with Melissa Stecher

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Season 3

Jesse interviews Melissa Stecher, founder of Hopeful Simplicity, discussing her 3S method designed to help busy moms declutter and organize their spaces for a more peaceful lifestyle. Melissa explains the importance of aligning organizational styles with personal and family needs, the emotional aspect of letting go of clutter, and the benefits of a supportive community. They explore the balance between visual and non-visual organizing, macro and micro systems, and the impact of these methods on family dynamics and personal well-being.


00:00 Introduction to Overwhelmed Lifestyles

00:30 Meet Melissa Stecher: Founder of Hopeful Simplicity
01:52 The Three S Method Explained
03:50 The Importance of Sustainable Organization
07:47 From Cleaning Products to Organizing Business
10:05 Adapting to Lifestyle Changes
19:40 Community and One-on-One Coaching
27:53 Impact of Organization on Personal Relationships
28:54 Understanding Personal Organization Styles
30:13 Teaching Organization to Children
31:20 The Obsession with Organization
33:32 Adapting Business to Organizational Needs
36:14 Feeling and Frameworks in Organization
45:11 Simplifying and Decluttering
51:32 The Promise of Better Organization

Set the stage for an amazing new year with the Self First Framework.

https://calendly.com/jesse04/self-first-webinar

Download a PDF copy of Becoming the Promise You are Intended to Be
https://www.depthbuilder.com/books

00:00 - Welcome And Why Home Chaos Hurts

01:55 - Meet Melissa And Hopeful Simplicity

03:35 - The 3S Method Explained

06:55 - Visual Clutter And Mental Load

10:50 - Origin Story And Rebrand Journey

17:25 - Lifestyle By Design, Not Default

20:50 - Organizing Styles: Visual vs Non-Visual

26:33 - Macro vs Micro Systems At Home

32:18 - Reducing Household Arguments With Fit

37:38 - Community, Boundaries, And Tough Love

43:48 - One-On-One Coaching Reality

49:23 - Vulnerability, Judgment, And Safety

54:38 - Feeling Drives Systems That Work

WEBVTT

00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:13.839
If you want your lifestyle to be overwhelmed, resentful, pissed off, angry, because you have to follow the kids around and put their toys away, or you have to follow your partner away and put the freaking shoes where they go, or you have to be the problem solver, great.

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That's your choice.

00:00:15.519 --> 00:00:26.239
If you want your lifestyle to look a little calmer, a little hopeful, yeah, yeah, then it's an on-board home team.

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What is going on, LM family?

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I'm like super excited because I get to interview a super awesome friend of mine that man, we connected way back when like Clubhouse was a thing.

00:00:43.439 --> 00:00:46.799
She is the founder of Hopeful Simplicity.

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She helps busy women organize their spaces and makes organization feel doable with her 3S method, which of course we're going to learn a little bit about this 3S method.

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My friend's name is Melissa Stetcher, who is the coolest person that I get to hang out with on the regular.

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And I'm sure you're going to fall in love with her.

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But before we get to learn more about that, if this is your first time here, you're listening to the Learnins and Missteps podcast, where amazing people just like you tell us how they are sharing their gifts and talents to leave this world better than they found it.

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I'm Jesse, your selfish servant, and we about to get to know Miss Melissa.

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Miss Melissa, how are you doing, my sister?

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We did it.

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We're here.

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I'm so excited.

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We too, we too, especially.

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We got time zones crossed up and we rescheduling, but the stars have aligned, and here we are.

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So the world wants to know, Melissa.

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What is this 3S method?

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It is the method I created for okay.

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So it's the method I created because busy moms like me.

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I can walk into a room and be like, sure, I'm gonna declutter.

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That's it.

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But the 3S method tells you exactly what to do.

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So it's a method that simplifies the decluttering process, it simplifies the organizing process, but it hones into that really key factor of sustaining an organized life.

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And I think too often we're it's overwhelming.

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It's too much.

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Moms have decision fatigue and brain, like I don't even know 90% of the time.

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So I needed something to tell me exactly what to do.

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I don't want to make another decision, I don't want to have to figure it out.

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And if I'm gonna pull out my phone to figure it out, I'd much rather watch people hurt themselves or people fall downstairs or cute puppies.

00:03:03.439 --> 00:03:05.520
Yeah, and that's what the 3S method is.

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It's an organizing solution system method for busy moms to make it simplified.

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Okay, so here's what I think I'm hearing because I don't have a problem with disorganized space at all.

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But what I'm hearing is some people walk into a space and it's just ah, it's not organized.

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And so then the question or angst and irritation and anxiety starts building because it's like, where do I start?

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And the 3S method, there's levels or layers in terms of how to start and then the next step, and then how to keep things organized because that's the issue, right?

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Is nothing ever just stays organized.

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Am I reading it right?

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Yeah, the sustainability part.

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So the 3S method, it's simplify, sustain.

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Okay.

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3D F in the method, and the sustainable part, it takes that delusion that we have of ourselves as organizing as one size fits all, but also, well, I got organized, it'll stay that way.

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But hi, we're living real lives, things are always coming in, things are always going out, we're going through phases and seasons of existence, so we need to just stop pretending once we get it done, it'll be done because it's just not reality.

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Okay, so what keeps us from just leaving it as it is?

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Well, have to be organized.

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Hang on, I'm channeling my appropriate wording for this because moms are the central hubs of most homes, right?

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I'm not belittling dads, I'm not saying men don't do that, I'm whatever.

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But when do I have an appointment?

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Do is my uniform clean?

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Have you seen my keys?

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Do we pack the lunches?

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Who's the kid's teacher?

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No.

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And so if we are stressed out by all the decisions we're already making, and then we have clutter sitting around, that's a layer of visual overwhelm that we already don't know.

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So visual clutter leads to mental clutter.

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We don't have room for any more crap in our heads.

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So if the house is organized, if the house is calm, it's one thing taken away out of our overload, out of our overwhelm, and then maybe hopefully one step closer to a little less stressed and a little less resentful and a lot less angry.

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Okay, I like that.

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I can get on board with that.

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So, this method is this something that you go hiking in the Himalayas and find ancient transcript of the 3S method, or is how did you come across this way of organizing and sustaining the organization, organized space?

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That would be dope, wouldn't it?

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Like long as where the Moanas of the next generation are going into some cave, bang on a boat thing, and then 3S method just happens to chime out.

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That would be so dope.

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I won't be here for it, but that's okay.

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So it I think part of it stemmed from it's really broken down, I think, is chapter five of the first book as the why.

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Why do you have to declutter?

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Okay, but why do you have to know what to declutter?

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Okay, but why do you have to organize?

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Okay, but what do you organize?

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And I'm like, I don't, I don't know.

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And then I read this really neat book by my friend Jesse.

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I don't have my plumber's edition anymore, but I do have a newer edition, and he talks about methods and breaks it down and gives me things to step in.

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So honing the 5S thing, I think it's 5S.

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Yeah, and then I need something simplified like that.

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What would make sense to me?

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Ah, assuming the world starts and stops just like I think.

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All right.

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So I need clarity, and I will ask the questions until I am blue and purple on the face.

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I will.

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Oh, yeah.

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Because I need to understand.

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And if I don't understand, that means maybe someone else doesn't understand.

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Yes.

00:07:06.720 --> 00:07:09.600
That's kind of how that came about is why?

00:07:09.759 --> 00:07:10.399
Okay, but why?

00:07:10.560 --> 00:07:11.199
Okay, but why?

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Okay, but more.

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And then I got it as simplified as I could get it simplified.

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Yes.

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Okay, and so now you have so you got the 3S method, you're helping busy women, moms, like women, all of the above, organize their spaces.

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You have hopeful simplicity, you have a community.

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Like, was this your vision as a young lady when you were roller?

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I want to help people organize.

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No, no, my vision was I was going to do Disney voiceovers and sing a lot.

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Oh, okay.

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I like that.

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And here we are.

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So it actually, so this came about even before Hopeful Simplicity did.

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I rebranded when organizing kind of took over the business.

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It started with cleaning products and homemade products, and I need to not have to hold my breath when cleaning that kind of manifested and shifted and rebranded into an organizing business because I came to the realization that cleaning was just part of it.

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That's just the last part and the minor detail of it.

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That's over the decade, it kind of became this, it's an organizing business.

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Yeah.

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It was never a childhood thing.

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And I was, I mean, I was one of those kids that had a path from the door to the bed.

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Yes, me too.

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Yeah, I am still some of those sometimes like that.

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Yeah, yeah.

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Yeah.

00:08:47.759 --> 00:08:51.360
So okay, so you mentioned that like the business started off.

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I think there's an important point here because I know we've got a lot of LM family members out there that are like side hustling or trying to launch an idea.

00:09:00.240 --> 00:09:14.559
So it started off with like it sounded like household cleaning products, homemade hyper cleaning methods, and then it turned into what is now Gris method and organization.

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So here's the question: how hard was it for you to like let go of what you originally thought it needed to be and transition to what it is now?

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It was more emotional than I thought it would be.

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Oh.

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Because I had products and shops here locally.

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I did fairs and festivals and winter markets and things like that.

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Now, the introvert in me was like, Woo, stay home.

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But the business part of me is but I can help people and I'm I can talk to people and I can, and then you know, a pandemic hit, and I'm like, that's gone.

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That's done.

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Forget that.

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And so that I think the pandemic personally helped me release it by force instead of have to.

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And then a friend came to visit before social distancing, and I happen to be living with somebody, and we had a couple kids staying with us, and we were meal planning and meal prepping, and we were doing it together.

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We want to do the LM family member shout out, and this one goes out to Mr.

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Clyde.

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Mr.

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Clyde sent this, he says, I'm juggling construction work, coaching, and family, and this helped me calm the chaos in my head.

00:10:36.240 --> 00:10:37.519
And what's he talking about?

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He's talking about the self-first time mastery workshop.

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So, first, Clyde, thank you for like taking the time to sign up and then coming to the session and contributing.

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And I'm super happy that it contributed to you in a big way.

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And folks, for the rest of you out there that are listening, if you don't know, I gotta tell you, I love attention, I love knowing that you're out there.

00:10:58.159 --> 00:11:07.039
So send me a comment, leave a review, do the stars, all of the things, because it gives me an opportunity to shout you out again in the future.

00:11:09.519 --> 00:11:09.840
Okay.

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I'm kind of a lot, right?

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Like, I'm like, I'm not doing this, or nobody's eating.

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Like, we're doing this, or I don't care.

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And she's she asked me later, she's like, but how did you do that?

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I'm like, how did I how did I do what she's you guys communicated?

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He looked at the list, you looked at the list, you looked in the pantry, he looked in the fridge, you made it all work in this planner for the week.

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How did you do that?

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And then I was just like, Oh, this is beyond products, this is a lifestyle choice, this is a home management option, this is beyond who runs the vacuum.

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And that really opened up my eyes to rebrand in a way and reformat the business to better serve what really needs to happen.

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You can go to the supermarket and buy cleaning product, it may or may not make you sneeze, you may or may not like the smell, but until you can brace a lifestyle that actually fits, yeah, that's the difference.

00:12:10.559 --> 00:12:30.480
So, and you're saying lifestyle, what I'm hearing when you say a lifestyle that fits, what I'm hearing is like a method or a thinking mental models that help do the organization as a singular individual or as with roommates, with a husband, with kids, like all of the above.

00:12:31.039 --> 00:12:32.080
Is that what I'm hearing?

00:12:32.399 --> 00:12:37.600
It's so when I say lifestyle, I mean what do you want the style of your life to be?

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If you share a house, people are gonna be in it.

00:12:41.360 --> 00:12:43.039
Yes, it is what it is.

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So if you want your lifestyle to be overwhelmed, resentful, pissed off, angry, because you have to follow the kids around and put their toys away, or you have to follow your partner away and put the freaking shoes where they go, or you have to be the problem solver, great, that's your choice.

00:12:59.039 --> 00:13:18.320
If you want your lifestyle to look a little calmer, a little hopeful, yeah, yeah, then it's an onboard home team, home office even situation because you don't want to carry that to the office, you don't want to get home from the office and be like, no, I'm not going in there.

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Right.

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So that's what I mean by lifestyle.

00:13:20.960 --> 00:13:27.759
It's no different than our family's gonna eat healthier, so we're going to cook meals that we all like, we're all gonna do this.

00:13:27.840 --> 00:13:30.559
It's no different, it's just a new way of thinking about it.

00:13:31.279 --> 00:13:40.320
Okay, now in the line of style lifestyle, I've seen some of your posts on the Instagram and on the LinkedIn because you're active.

00:13:40.559 --> 00:13:45.039
And I remember seeing some posts about organizational styles.

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What is that?

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That is knowing you.

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You, you're selfish, you love you.

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Who doesn't?

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I do.

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It's knowing what works best for you.

00:13:54.799 --> 00:14:00.559
So there's four styles generally, and you'll hear it across different organizing people, right?

00:14:00.799 --> 00:14:05.440
Pick the one that fits your flavor, but it's knowing visual, non-visual.

00:14:05.840 --> 00:14:09.679
My office setup, I love these things, so they're visually out.

00:14:10.080 --> 00:14:12.879
The things I don't love are non-visually set up.

00:14:12.960 --> 00:14:13.919
You know what you don't see?

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You don't see a whole bunch of paper, you don't see a whole bunch of notebooks, you don't see all my office supplies, all my files.

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All of those are non-visual setups.

00:14:23.200 --> 00:14:24.799
Same with macro and micro.

00:14:24.960 --> 00:14:27.840
I live with a 17-year-old boy.

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There is no way in 40 flipping universe am I going to get him to open a container, even if it takes the lid off, put something in it, and put the lid back.

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It's never going to happen.

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I know this because it is his organizing style.

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If it's not put away hard and fast, it's not getting put away like mom wants it.

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So the spaces we share, the living room, the kitchen, the bathroom are very set up for one-step put away, which is a macro organizing system.

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My office, my sock drawer, my closet, set up how I need it to be a very micro system, which is a one-step finding thing.

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If I have to look for it, dig for it, or search for it, I am pissed off.

00:15:16.320 --> 00:15:20.240
About to be stressed out by the time I've even find the shirt I want to wear in the morning.

00:15:20.480 --> 00:15:22.879
Yes, I feel that in all kinds of ways.

00:15:23.039 --> 00:15:26.559
Because I've similarly like I know where I put things.

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I exam, when I go visit my mom, sometimes I typically leave my keys in my pocket.

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But sometimes I'll take them out to unlock the door or whatever.

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And if they're not in my pocket, it's all shit.

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That's where they go.

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Or when I'm home, I put them on the thing.

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I live alone, so nobody moves my stuff.

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But I've lived with other people, and when they move things from where I put them, like that is not okay.

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That is a problem.

00:15:56.559 --> 00:16:04.320
But it's also important to know what's going to work for the space people you're sharing things with, right?

00:16:04.480 --> 00:16:10.080
I know I can have the best system in place, but if it's not gonna work for him, it's not the right system, right?

00:16:10.159 --> 00:16:20.399
So if it's a shared space, all the movies and DVDs and video games could be color coordinated, organized by how you play it, who plays it, all the things.

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It's never gonna put back by that.

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So I have to set it up for the least argumentative situation.

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So if you're organizing with more than one person, we always lean for visual organizing.

00:16:31.679 --> 00:16:31.919
Okay.

00:16:32.159 --> 00:16:48.879
So the pantry door might be solid, but you're gonna open the pantry door, all the clear containers are inside, so you can see exactly what's in there when you need it, because it's easier for somebody to see where it goes instead of find where it goes because it's not gonna happen.

00:16:49.039 --> 00:16:51.519
And it's the same for macro versus micro.

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It's easier to take steps away from me and my want to take a lid off, and there's this inside the this where I can just drop stuff, done, right?

00:17:01.360 --> 00:17:02.000
Put away.

00:17:02.240 --> 00:17:12.480
He can he, I'm not saying he can't, but I'm saying he's less likely to succeed if I add steps to his process.

00:17:12.640 --> 00:17:12.720
Yeah.

00:17:16.960 --> 00:17:17.279
Got it.

00:17:17.440 --> 00:17:24.720
Okay, so I'm curious, like this micro and macro thing sounds like.

00:17:24.880 --> 00:17:34.319
I mean, obviously, you gave your example where you can function within both methods, and maybe there it's appropriate in some cases and not in other cases, depending on the thing.

00:17:34.960 --> 00:17:44.480
What's ringing in my head is helping couples or mom and kids stop arguing over dumb shit.

00:17:44.799 --> 00:17:46.880
Am I yes?

00:17:47.599 --> 00:17:52.480
Yeah, and I will be the first to admit my way's the right way.

00:17:52.640 --> 00:17:54.079
Why aren't you just on board?

00:17:54.319 --> 00:18:05.119
Has come out of my mouth in more angry tones than I was like my brain at first cannot have it's like, why can't they just what just put it where it goes?

00:18:05.519 --> 00:18:08.480
Just it it goes there, yeah.

00:18:09.920 --> 00:18:13.440
It took me the longest time to let go of that control.

00:18:16.079 --> 00:18:16.559
Ow.

00:18:16.960 --> 00:18:24.640
It hurts a little still, but to realize, oh, I put the hurdle at six feet and they're only three.

00:18:25.920 --> 00:18:37.200
I've got to stop thinking they're actually going to use 17 beautifully color-coordinated labeled toy boxes that are all stackable and how they work in my brain.

00:18:37.279 --> 00:18:39.759
And Pinterest told me it's perfect.

00:18:41.119 --> 00:18:42.319
That's cute.

00:18:43.680 --> 00:18:46.240
That's your choice, that's your lifestyle choice, though, right?

00:18:46.319 --> 00:18:51.519
It can be Pinterest perfect, but you're choosing to be the one to make it like that every day.

00:18:51.599 --> 00:18:57.440
And then don't be when you're like, Why can't my kids just because it's not set up for them?

00:18:57.519 --> 00:18:59.839
They're over here going, You want me to pick up my toys?

00:18:59.920 --> 00:19:01.759
I need it to be like done.

00:19:02.000 --> 00:19:05.039
Give me a bucket, let me throw all my crap in there, I'm good.

00:19:05.200 --> 00:19:16.960
Yeah, so like the community element of your offerings, how much of that is counseling around you need more control, right?

00:19:17.039 --> 00:19:20.079
Like, just you need this, isn't just about you.

00:19:21.839 --> 00:19:26.559
I will say that I have and I have it in multiple places because I think it does.

00:19:26.960 --> 00:19:30.720
I am not a I am not a licensed therapist.

00:19:33.200 --> 00:19:33.519
Okay.

00:19:34.640 --> 00:19:35.599
I am not.

00:19:36.079 --> 00:19:39.599
I am kind of an a-hole.

00:19:39.920 --> 00:19:40.559
Yeah.

00:19:40.880 --> 00:19:44.079
And so the community, so we have a couple communities.

00:19:44.160 --> 00:19:47.920
The monthly membership is really like where I'm I show up.

00:19:48.079 --> 00:19:53.119
It is not always kind, it's always kind, but sometimes it's that's cute.

00:19:53.200 --> 00:19:54.640
But you said that last month.

00:19:54.960 --> 00:19:58.720
What are we doing now with the same pile of same excuses?

00:19:59.359 --> 00:20:03.440
And so that's I forgot what your question was, but you're gonna be straight.

00:20:03.599 --> 00:20:08.640
So, yeah, no, it's not mental health because that's not I don't have those letters behind my name.

00:20:08.799 --> 00:20:18.480
Yeah, if you sign up for the monthly membership and join us every month, I'm not the only one that may or may not be like, that's not gonna work.

00:20:18.640 --> 00:20:19.359
That's dumb.

00:20:19.440 --> 00:20:20.400
Get rid of it.

00:20:20.640 --> 00:20:21.680
Yeah, yeah.

00:20:21.839 --> 00:20:24.319
Take steps, take action, stop whining.

00:20:24.559 --> 00:20:27.359
If you want to whine, there's another number to call.

00:20:28.000 --> 00:20:29.200
Yes, yeah.

00:20:29.440 --> 00:20:35.680
But I also on the same side, one of my one of my clients now, she's in the membership group.

00:20:35.839 --> 00:20:37.920
I absolutely adore her to pieces.

00:20:38.079 --> 00:20:42.880
Yeah, I didn't ask ahead of time to share her name, so I won't, but you'll see you've probably seen her in clips.

00:20:42.960 --> 00:20:44.960
She's left reviews and stuff.

00:20:45.279 --> 00:20:52.400
And when we first met, I refused to work with her one-on-one because she was living like a hoarder.

00:20:52.799 --> 00:20:57.680
There was not getting from room to room safely, more or less, right?

00:20:58.160 --> 00:21:01.839
There was step over this, go over that, and go over a couple years later.

00:21:02.000 --> 00:21:05.200
She reached out, she's I have gotten the mental help I need.

00:21:05.440 --> 00:21:06.400
What can we do?

00:21:06.559 --> 00:21:11.680
And so now I see her every month and we talk regularly and we email when she's uh wants to email.

00:21:11.920 --> 00:21:22.559
And those are like, I know my boundaries, but if you aren't taking the mental health status to get to workable, that's well beyond my abilities.

00:21:22.880 --> 00:21:23.359
Wow.

00:21:23.599 --> 00:21:30.400
Okay, so you have an online monthly calls for the community and you do one-on-one coaching.

00:21:30.720 --> 00:21:32.079
Yeah, okay.

00:21:32.319 --> 00:21:39.200
I'm really curious about this one-on-one, not because I I need it, like I'm fine with my disaster.

00:21:39.279 --> 00:21:41.119
I know where everything is, it's good.

00:21:42.000 --> 00:21:45.039
But I'm just curious, what is that one-on-one?

00:21:47.440 --> 00:21:48.799
Let me ask it this way.

00:21:48.960 --> 00:21:58.400
When you decided to do one-on-one call coaching, what did you think that was gonna look like compared to what it actually looks like?

00:22:00.319 --> 00:22:04.960
I thought it would look like show me your room, let's shop on Amazon together.

00:22:05.119 --> 00:22:05.920
Here, put these on.

00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:07.359
I'll see you next week.

00:22:07.599 --> 00:22:13.759
What it actually looks like is, and it is probably not the best business financial choice.

00:22:14.160 --> 00:22:19.920
There often looks to me going from the first time, okay.

00:22:20.000 --> 00:22:23.119
I think you need to take a step back and join the monthly group.

00:22:23.279 --> 00:22:35.680
Not a monthly group, it's a cheaper option, but when you get a group of women in the various ages and phases of life, so much more can happen.

00:22:37.119 --> 00:22:44.559
And I think I can't personally relate to my kids are growing out of the house.

00:22:45.039 --> 00:22:46.960
Now, I can help you organize that.

00:22:47.119 --> 00:22:57.200
I have read the books, I've done the homework, I've done all that stuff to help, but there's just an energy, and I don't even know how to explain it.

00:22:57.680 --> 00:23:01.519
Yeah, energy, I think, is the best word that says join us every month.

00:23:01.680 --> 00:23:01.839
Yeah.

00:23:02.240 --> 00:23:03.920
Bonus, save yourself money.

00:23:04.160 --> 00:23:12.319
And I'm not saying I won't continue to work with people one-on-one, but I just mental health, accountability, all of those, you get those from people.

00:23:12.640 --> 00:23:13.119
Yeah.

00:23:13.359 --> 00:23:16.400
And you never know what other people will be like bringing to the table.

00:23:16.640 --> 00:23:18.880
Yeah, you get to kind of pick up, pick and choose.

00:23:18.960 --> 00:23:23.599
Oh, that sounded good, or oh, the way you think about it, the way you said it makes sense to me now.

00:23:23.759 --> 00:23:24.000
Yeah.

00:23:24.240 --> 00:23:26.079
And I can go and run with it.

00:23:26.319 --> 00:23:30.319
So then the one-on-one, like, what is the purpose of the one-on-one?

00:23:30.640 --> 00:23:37.440
Is it like, do I call you up and you tell my and I turn my camera around and I say, okay, look in my room, tell me what to do.

00:23:38.079 --> 00:23:38.960
Kind of.

00:23:39.200 --> 00:23:43.039
So the one-on-one, if we've not worked together, I will vet you beforehand.

00:23:43.200 --> 00:23:52.960
I run into that situation, like, no, but I will normally it starts with show me a space that doesn't make you angry.

00:23:53.440 --> 00:23:56.319
Show me a space that you think works.

00:23:56.880 --> 00:23:57.200
Ah.

00:23:57.599 --> 00:24:06.559
And then we die, oh, I see that junk drawer works for you, Jesse, because you have containers inside, which to me means you're a microorganizer.

00:24:07.039 --> 00:24:16.160
So your pajama drawer is probably not working because you haven't folded anything, you haven't separated the tops and bottoms, and that's probably why it's leading to frustration.

00:24:17.039 --> 00:24:17.680
Got it.

00:24:17.839 --> 00:24:23.440
So you can diagnose based on show me what works and show me what doesn't.

00:24:23.759 --> 00:24:26.960
Because most of us aren't aware or thinking in those frameworks.

00:24:27.039 --> 00:24:28.960
It's just this works and this one doesn't.

00:24:29.119 --> 00:24:30.640
I don't know what the deal is.

00:24:30.880 --> 00:24:31.279
Yeah.

00:24:31.599 --> 00:24:38.160
Man, also if you're one-on-one, it's less scary than one-on-four.

00:24:38.799 --> 00:24:40.960
Like I know everyone in the group, right?

00:24:41.279 --> 00:24:50.799
You might because this is a there's like a level, an um an intense level of vulnerability here for you to be seeing like all my mess.

00:24:51.119 --> 00:24:51.759
Yeah.

00:24:52.319 --> 00:24:52.960
Yeah.

00:24:53.279 --> 00:24:53.599
Yeah.

00:24:53.839 --> 00:24:56.559
It's scary to open the front door to a stranger.

00:24:56.799 --> 00:24:57.440
Yeah.

00:24:57.920 --> 00:25:00.799
I mean, unless you're in the hood and then you're just ready to go.

00:25:00.960 --> 00:25:05.279
But it can be scary, and especially if you're used to people judging you.

00:25:05.440 --> 00:25:06.640
I have no judgment.

00:25:06.880 --> 00:25:07.119
Yeah.

00:25:07.279 --> 00:25:09.279
If I had judgment, we probably wouldn't talk.

00:25:09.519 --> 00:25:13.359
Honestly, because my face will say it, so I know I'm not gonna judge you.

00:25:13.599 --> 00:25:14.079
Yeah.

00:25:14.319 --> 00:25:16.240
But I do know that's scary.

00:25:16.400 --> 00:25:17.759
And then we get in our own heads.

00:25:17.839 --> 00:25:24.400
I know too many women that are like, oh, I oh, I gotta go clean the house before the house cleaner comes over.

00:25:24.720 --> 00:25:25.359
Wait.

00:25:26.160 --> 00:25:26.799
What?

00:25:27.279 --> 00:25:27.599
Yeah.

00:25:27.839 --> 00:25:31.599
And I think that's in our oh, I gotta go tidy up before the organizer comes over.

00:25:31.839 --> 00:25:33.279
That's what they're here for.

00:25:33.680 --> 00:25:34.319
Yeah.

00:25:34.880 --> 00:25:51.839
So I I can imagine that this is super helpful to people because I mean, I'm just thinking about my mom and all my exes that would lose their mind because they wanted me to do stuff a certain way, and I'm like, I don't understand what the issue is.

00:25:52.000 --> 00:25:54.000
Yeah, I really don't understand.

00:25:54.240 --> 00:26:02.000
It's not that I don't care, it's that I don't understand, and all I'm understanding is I'm doing it wrong.

00:26:02.319 --> 00:26:04.559
I can't do anything with that.

00:26:05.680 --> 00:26:09.519
So the framework or the styles, right?

00:26:09.680 --> 00:26:14.160
Micro, macro, visual, non-visual, those make total sense to me.

00:26:14.240 --> 00:26:19.440
Like, I I still swear, I need me a glass door refrigerator.

00:26:19.599 --> 00:26:28.880
That would be like the ultimate, so that I could see what's in there, and I never double order groceries and I never run out of anything because I could see everything.

00:26:29.039 --> 00:26:33.599
Like, I gotta that's the majority of the way I organize.

00:26:33.680 --> 00:26:41.200
Now, there's some things where I'll have like little compartment, like for my backpack when I'm traveling with all my camera gear and stuff.

00:26:41.359 --> 00:26:43.119
Like, I have it very right.

00:26:43.200 --> 00:26:45.839
There's a space, and I've got what do you call them?

00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:53.359
Shadow boards for like my remotes and jump drives and as portable, what do they call them?

00:26:53.519 --> 00:26:54.000
Hard drives.

00:26:54.240 --> 00:26:55.039
Portable hard drives.

00:26:55.119 --> 00:26:58.000
I got them nice and organized because I got to be able to see them.

00:26:58.240 --> 00:26:59.440
They go in their place.

00:26:59.519 --> 00:27:07.680
And right, so there's I under like I never would have given it, I couldn't label it before, but I do understand.

00:27:07.759 --> 00:27:17.920
Okay, super visual, and there is some, I do have some micro tendencies, but with the for important things that I'm gonna be touching frequently.

00:27:18.559 --> 00:27:25.039
For things that I'm not gonna touch, I'm sorry, for things that I'm gonna be touching infrequently, I'm kind of micro.

00:27:25.279 --> 00:27:30.880
For stuff that I touch all the time, like my clothes and this sort of thing, I'm macro, man.

00:27:30.960 --> 00:27:33.039
Just dump it on a box and I'm good.

00:27:33.440 --> 00:27:34.240
Whatever.

00:27:34.559 --> 00:27:42.319
And so giving it like I guess what I'm trying to say is knowing these styles or this framework, I think helps people.

00:27:42.480 --> 00:27:52.960
Do any of your coaches, the ones one-on-ones or the community group, do any of them feel like, man, we're not I'm not fighting with the kids anymore, I'm not fighting with my significant other anymore.

00:27:53.119 --> 00:27:54.960
Does it have that kind of impact on them?

00:27:55.599 --> 00:27:57.200
You have to ask them, Doug.

00:27:57.599 --> 00:27:59.920
You have to join us next month to ask them.

00:28:02.799 --> 00:28:10.400
I think it more has I think it has a bigger impact on the person in it.

00:28:11.200 --> 00:28:16.799
So let me explain this because what you were just saying is thank God we don't live together.

00:28:18.240 --> 00:28:28.720
But what I actually heard was, and you and I are very similar in this, I am a general categories, I am a non-visual microorganizer.

00:28:28.799 --> 00:28:32.480
I don't want to see my stuff all the time, I want to find it in one step.

00:28:32.799 --> 00:28:39.759
Productive-wise, I have to see everything I need.

00:28:39.920 --> 00:28:40.319
Period.

00:28:40.400 --> 00:28:47.839
I will go to that closet, I will grab my podcast bucket, which has my headphones, has my microphone, normally has a spare notebook.

00:28:48.160 --> 00:28:52.799
Because if I don't have it all in one thing, out ready to go, that's it.

00:28:52.960 --> 00:28:54.160
It's not happening.

00:28:54.480 --> 00:29:00.559
So I think the realization of it may, I'm sure it does impact the relationships of the house, right?

00:29:00.640 --> 00:29:07.839
Like I know it has here, I'm sure it has with me and my son, even though he's he's very much like me, so it just kind of works.

00:29:08.160 --> 00:29:17.440
But I think it more impacts our relationships with our health, with ourselves, with our own mental abilities of like, why isn't this working?

00:29:17.599 --> 00:29:20.079
Oh, because it's not set up for yourself, right?

00:29:20.160 --> 00:29:23.920
Like, why is a wall full of sticky notes to-do list not working?

00:29:24.079 --> 00:29:25.839
Oh, because I don't want to see it all.

00:29:26.000 --> 00:29:28.640
Uh, this is not set up for my success.

00:29:28.880 --> 00:29:33.440
Why folding the sheets by set isn't working?

00:29:33.680 --> 00:29:37.599
Oh, because I just want to grab a flat one when I change the bedding and be done with it.

00:29:37.759 --> 00:29:44.880
Yes, and I think that overall, once you get clearer with yourself, once you get, hey self, why isn't this working?

00:29:45.039 --> 00:29:50.160
Then that outwardly can impact the relationships in the home or in the office.

00:29:50.319 --> 00:29:53.920
I think that just has a natural occurrence.

00:29:54.160 --> 00:30:01.759
But then also, if you've got littles or if you've got a you, if you and I shared a space, I'd be like, Like, okay, but why is it not working?

00:30:01.920 --> 00:30:03.920
Oh, because you're not a visual person.

00:30:04.160 --> 00:30:07.039
What the hell do you have everything on the board for, dummy?

00:30:07.119 --> 00:30:07.279
Yeah.

00:30:07.440 --> 00:30:07.680
Right?

00:30:07.839 --> 00:30:09.599
So, but you wouldn't talk to your kids like that.

00:30:09.680 --> 00:30:13.119
You're like, okay, but let's break it down.

00:30:13.279 --> 00:30:16.720
I'll never forget teaching my son to take over his laundry.

00:30:18.559 --> 00:30:21.759
Because I had to put on an eight-year-old boy's hat.

00:30:22.000 --> 00:30:23.759
I've never been an eight-year-old boy.

00:30:24.400 --> 00:30:25.279
I don't know what that.

00:30:25.680 --> 00:30:34.799
And the conversation was like, this is the outcome, but I don't want to do your laundry, and I don't want you to call me from college.

00:30:34.880 --> 00:30:37.839
And I really don't want to touch a teenage boy's clothes.

00:30:40.079 --> 00:30:48.079
How do we get from here where I'm angry and resentful and confused to here and dialing it back?

00:30:48.400 --> 00:30:50.880
Okay, oh, you need a no-fold system.

00:30:51.359 --> 00:30:52.559
Let's start with that.

00:30:52.640 --> 00:30:53.920
Let's switch that out.

00:30:54.240 --> 00:31:00.000
Oh, you need something visually marked on the washer on where to turn the dial.

00:31:00.160 --> 00:31:01.680
Let's go with that.

00:31:02.079 --> 00:31:06.079
Oh, you need a reminder on the calendar in the kitchen.

00:31:06.559 --> 00:31:08.160
Today is your day.

00:31:08.400 --> 00:31:09.759
Let's do that.

00:31:10.640 --> 00:31:18.640
And I think getting used to yourself helps you communicate with those you share spaces with to make systems work for everybody.

00:31:18.960 --> 00:31:20.000
Got okay.

00:31:20.240 --> 00:31:29.519
So what's I mean, clearly, here's what's amazing is like hearing you talk about it to the level of granularity and understanding is this is a thing.

00:31:29.759 --> 00:31:51.119
With all the stuff that we have to deal with in the world, in our all our independent world, but in your world specifically, what was it about an organization that just intrigued you so much for you to spend the amount of time necessary to get as clear as you are about what it means and how to do it?

00:31:53.440 --> 00:31:55.200
Okay, say it again.

00:31:55.599 --> 00:31:56.160
Yeah.

00:31:56.400 --> 00:32:01.039
Like, why do you obsess about organization?

00:32:02.880 --> 00:32:03.680
Obsess?

00:32:04.079 --> 00:32:04.720
What?

00:32:05.519 --> 00:32:13.680
Well, I say that because I think for me, obsess is it's a positive term because there's things that I understand to a degree.

00:32:13.839 --> 00:32:22.079
I mean, you've gone through the time management thing, like there's layers and layers of psychosis in there because it's something that I obsess about.

00:32:22.160 --> 00:32:30.880
It's I spend enormous amounts of time thinking about it, doing it, analyzing why it works, analyzing why it doesn't work, tweaking and adjusting.

00:32:30.960 --> 00:32:32.319
And so that's what I mean by obsessed.

00:32:32.400 --> 00:32:41.119
Like, it's just consume my mind to understand it better, not just for my own application, but also so that I could help other people with it.

00:32:41.599 --> 00:32:42.240
Yeah.

00:32:42.559 --> 00:32:47.279
So I think obsessed because if the door is open, I have to close it.

00:32:47.440 --> 00:32:49.680
That's so earlier.

00:32:51.519 --> 00:32:56.319
Honestly, in a simple way, I didn't like who I was when we weren't.

00:32:56.720 --> 00:33:08.880
Ah, I was I can be a lot, but deep down, like once you get to know me, that a lot is let's go together.

00:33:09.039 --> 00:33:09.839
What can we do?

00:33:10.079 --> 00:33:12.160
All the boats rise, how can I help?

00:33:12.319 --> 00:33:14.319
That's the kind of energy I really bring.

00:33:14.480 --> 00:33:18.240
But if you don't know me, you don't it can be like, whoa, yeah.

00:33:18.559 --> 00:33:28.640
Oh no, but I was just tired of I was sick and tired of being sick and tired of being resentful, angry, and being asked questions.

00:33:29.440 --> 00:33:32.319
And so that drove you to okay, let me understand this.

00:33:32.480 --> 00:33:36.400
And then the pandemic hit, and so I gotta shift my business.

00:33:36.559 --> 00:33:38.960
I'm I can help people with this.

00:33:39.440 --> 00:33:53.039
And so here's a curious thing, and I'm gonna ask it this way because like I started my business just over three and a half years ago, and I had an idea of what I was gonna be doing and what it was gonna look like, and all those things.

00:33:53.200 --> 00:34:08.079
Well, fast forward three years, and it is very different than what I wanted, what I thought I was gonna be doing, and that's mostly informed by the people that reach out to me based on what I put out there for them to see.

00:34:08.320 --> 00:34:12.079
In terms like you said, okay, I gotta switch over to this organization thing.

00:34:12.159 --> 00:34:19.119
What did those conversations sound like back then compared to the evolution to now?

00:34:20.239 --> 00:34:29.039
It was a lot more me asking the questions and me really breaking it down to understand what the need was.

00:34:29.199 --> 00:34:41.199
My need for home living is very different than yours, but it's very different than over there, and really honing in on the okay, but how do you want this room to feel when you walk into it?

00:34:41.679 --> 00:34:46.239
And then back stepping, okay, where are we and how do we get there?

00:34:46.480 --> 00:34:49.840
Yeah, and that really that I think really encouraged it.

00:34:49.920 --> 00:34:52.800
Like when that mom asks me, okay, but how did you do that?

00:34:53.599 --> 00:34:57.119
It really hit me like, duh, what do you mean?

00:34:57.199 --> 00:34:58.719
Like, just do it, yeah.

00:34:58.800 --> 00:34:59.840
Yeah, you just do it.

00:34:59.920 --> 00:35:03.280
You have the argument, you get pissed off about dinner, and then it just happens.

00:35:03.519 --> 00:35:05.599
I mean, it's really duh.

00:35:05.679 --> 00:35:11.760
You yell at somebody and then they don't want you to yell at them again, and of course, you're gonna like fix it.

00:35:12.159 --> 00:35:14.239
But I realize it's not easy, right?

00:35:14.400 --> 00:35:16.559
I have no problems asking questions.

00:35:16.800 --> 00:35:20.880
I have no problem sometimes being okay, this is not working.

00:35:20.960 --> 00:35:27.280
And if you don't want me to come home from work tomorrow and scream at you again, we need to do, we need to do something about it.

00:35:27.440 --> 00:35:29.119
Not me needing to solve it.

00:35:29.599 --> 00:35:36.000
People are scared of having hard conversations with their families, with their husbands, with their spouses, with their partners, whatever.

00:35:36.159 --> 00:35:39.679
Oh, they'll never just okay, hold my beer.

00:35:39.840 --> 00:35:42.159
Yeah, don't tell me we'll never.

00:35:42.559 --> 00:35:42.960
Yeah.

00:35:43.119 --> 00:35:45.679
I mean, I'm so proud of you and your sober journey, by the way.

00:35:45.840 --> 00:35:46.079
Thank you.

00:35:46.320 --> 00:35:52.800
Um, but I think I love a good challenge.

00:35:54.159 --> 00:36:01.440
And I like learning and reading and trying things out and solving that puzzle.

00:36:01.599 --> 00:36:05.280
It's just yeah, I really well.

00:36:05.360 --> 00:36:06.639
Here's the other interesting thing.

00:36:06.880 --> 00:36:12.719
Like, you've got these frameworks that obviously work because I mean, hell, I can make sense of them.

00:36:14.639 --> 00:36:22.639
And it sounds like your first interaction, like those discovery calls or whatever, are more about feeling.

00:36:22.880 --> 00:36:34.719
So, like, there's the feeling part than then helps you connect the different kinds of frameworks or we'll say prescription to helping people make organization feel doable.

00:36:35.360 --> 00:36:42.079
Um what and I'm I maybe I'm wrong, but it sounds like that was obvious from the beginning.

00:36:42.159 --> 00:36:49.679
It's a matter of feeling that then is the trigger that informs, okay, I don't want to feel like this anymore.

00:36:49.840 --> 00:36:52.239
If I want to feel different, we got to do something different.

00:36:52.400 --> 00:36:54.960
And you have the framework to help people get there.

00:36:55.360 --> 00:36:59.280
Yeah, it's breaking down, and it's multiple layers of feeling, right?

00:36:59.440 --> 00:37:04.079
I don't want to feel resentful, but I also want my kitchen to feel inviting and productive.

00:37:04.400 --> 00:37:04.719
Okay.

00:37:05.440 --> 00:37:06.079
Yeah.

00:37:06.400 --> 00:37:09.280
So how do we blend that?

00:37:09.679 --> 00:37:14.719
And then once I set it up, and then it's like, okay, mom's tired of cooking every night.

00:37:14.880 --> 00:37:17.679
How are we gonna get them to start taking over?

00:37:17.920 --> 00:37:22.079
Oh, how are we also going to get them to start doing the dishes?

00:37:22.400 --> 00:37:26.880
And then it's slowly adding to that final goal, that final feeling.

00:37:26.960 --> 00:37:30.719
If you come to my house, I want you to probably not smell anything.

00:37:30.800 --> 00:37:33.360
My goal is to have no odor in my house.

00:37:33.519 --> 00:37:43.199
I know it's a weird thing, but I also want you to feel like I'm gonna kick off my shoes, fall on the couch, she'll bring me a glass of wine or a cup of coffee or a snack.

00:37:43.840 --> 00:37:44.000
Right.

00:37:44.079 --> 00:37:50.320
I want you to feel like yeah, some people want you to walk in and be like, cool, thank you for visiting by.

00:37:51.119 --> 00:37:53.360
And that also can tie into your okay.

00:37:53.440 --> 00:37:54.480
So let me ask you a question.

00:37:54.559 --> 00:37:57.679
Have you ever, I'm just gonna ask, I didn't even ask permission.

00:37:57.920 --> 00:38:03.199
Have you ever gone somewhere, maybe somebody else's house, and you're just like uncomfortable?

00:38:03.440 --> 00:38:09.920
Oh, yeah, yes, not just because they're unpleasant people, no, just because of the layout, the setup.

00:38:10.079 --> 00:38:10.800
Absolutely.

00:38:10.960 --> 00:38:13.599
Yeah, hello organizing styles.

00:38:14.400 --> 00:38:14.800
Yeah.

00:38:15.039 --> 00:38:24.320
Because if I go to somebody's house who's clean white surfaces, everything's pristine, I'm gonna feel like I'm not taking my shoes off, I'm not allowed to leave the mat.

00:38:24.400 --> 00:38:27.199
I'm gonna sit on the very edge of the chair and not touch anything.

00:38:27.280 --> 00:38:32.960
Yeah, if I walk into a house, there's some color, there's maybe some kids' stuff over there, you got a fuzzy blank.

00:38:33.039 --> 00:38:34.400
I'm like, oh, home.

00:38:34.880 --> 00:38:35.519
Yes.

00:38:36.480 --> 00:38:40.159
That's it's the feeling organizational style right there.

00:38:40.639 --> 00:38:49.360
It's the feeling and understanding not only your goals and feelings, but how you want the space to serve you.

00:38:49.679 --> 00:38:51.280
Yeah, yeah.

00:38:51.760 --> 00:38:53.679
Okay, well, so folks, there you go.

00:38:53.760 --> 00:38:54.239
You got it.

00:38:54.400 --> 00:38:59.039
You walk into somebody's space, and it feels like if you touch something, an alarm's gonna go off.

00:38:59.280 --> 00:39:01.519
There's an organizational style there.

00:39:02.000 --> 00:39:08.559
But if you got squishy, fluffy stuff and colors, and you know, that that's a different organizational style.

00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:10.880
So am I wrong?

00:39:11.039 --> 00:39:19.440
Like, I always thought I could just go to Lowe's or Amazon and buy organizational things, and then I would be organized.

00:39:20.079 --> 00:39:21.679
Yes, you're wrong.

00:39:26.639 --> 00:39:31.360
So how many of so how many of the people that you help start there?

00:39:31.599 --> 00:39:33.920
Is it like that's where everybody starts?

00:39:35.679 --> 00:39:37.360
That is a pet peeve.

00:39:37.519 --> 00:39:41.440
Okay, it's a backwards-looking pet peeve because we've all been there, right?

00:39:41.519 --> 00:39:45.039
Like the in cap tells you, the ad tells you this new year, new you.

00:39:45.280 --> 00:39:46.800
Let's get organized for life.

00:39:47.519 --> 00:39:51.599
No, but that's what the outside world tells us.

00:39:51.760 --> 00:40:05.920
But I'm gonna tell you right now, if you don't know your organizing style, in three, six months, you're gonna be super pissed that you just spent$6,600 on new containers that didn't fix the problem.

00:40:09.519 --> 00:40:10.159
Yeah.

00:40:10.639 --> 00:40:13.920
And now, bonus, the problem's back.

00:40:14.159 --> 00:40:17.679
You have clutter from extra freaking containers.

00:40:18.000 --> 00:40:18.639
Yes.

00:40:26.079 --> 00:40:27.440
Oh, I love it.

00:40:27.519 --> 00:40:28.159
I love it.

00:40:28.480 --> 00:40:32.719
This is a real life example, and I'm not like an organizer.

00:40:32.960 --> 00:40:38.480
I'm fine with clutter until it impacts production, right?

00:40:38.639 --> 00:40:40.079
Like my clothes.

00:40:40.320 --> 00:40:46.880
I won't fold or hang my clothes, clean clothes, until I have to dig like more than once.

00:40:47.039 --> 00:40:53.039
And I was like, okay, it's time to hang everything up because I came and I was looking for socks yesterday, I'm looking for socks again.

00:40:53.679 --> 00:40:57.679
There's 20 pairs in there, I just need to fold them and put them away.

00:40:57.840 --> 00:40:59.519
Like, I it's that's I'm that way.

00:40:59.920 --> 00:41:04.239
Now I'm gonna here's my excuse because I travel so much, so I'm fancy.

00:41:04.400 --> 00:41:14.960
Anyways, I was helping somebody set up the Christmas tree for Christmas, and the instructions were go to the attic and bring the Christmas stuff down.

00:41:15.199 --> 00:41:16.239
And I said, Okay.

00:41:16.719 --> 00:41:19.360
So I went to the attic, and guess what?

00:41:19.920 --> 00:41:32.480
I did not, it was not clear at all where the Christmas stuff was, because everything was up there, like the Halloween stuff, the Thanksgiving stuff, the Christmas stuff, the all the stuff.

00:41:32.719 --> 00:41:35.679
And I'm like, I don't know where anything is.

00:41:36.000 --> 00:41:39.360
So she says, okay, well, then let me show you.

00:41:39.440 --> 00:41:40.960
And now the tension is up.

00:41:41.119 --> 00:41:42.079
Okay, fine, let me show you.

00:41:42.159 --> 00:41:48.159
Like, whoa, whoa, hey, wait a minute this isn't a meeting, and then says, Okay, we're doing it.

00:41:48.400 --> 00:41:53.519
But in my brain, I'm like, we could be this is gonna take us four hours.

00:41:53.840 --> 00:42:01.360
It could be done in like less than two, but we can't do anything separate because I don't know where the things are.

00:42:02.320 --> 00:42:05.360
So fast forward, I said, hey, I got an idea.

00:42:06.320 --> 00:42:16.639
I'm gonna add some more square footage up in the attic, and I'm gonna just separate all the stuff and three piles Christmas pile, Thanksgiving pile, Halloween pile.

00:42:16.880 --> 00:42:20.800
And then we'll put some web over where the Halloween stuff is.

00:42:20.880 --> 00:42:22.880
That's visual, that's where the Halloween stuff is.

00:42:22.960 --> 00:42:37.440
We'll put a turkey feather or something where the Thanksgiving stuff is, and then like garland where the Christmas stuff is like, my God, that'll be amazing! And so we did that, which made the next Christmas more productive, or the setup of the tree more productive.

00:42:37.679 --> 00:42:45.920
My point in that is it doesn't bother me until it's starting to impact production.

00:42:46.239 --> 00:42:56.480
It also what caught my attention was the fact that we were not having fun because of the arrangement, and so that was really like this is a thing, we need to fix this.

00:42:56.719 --> 00:42:59.519
Now, I didn't go and guess what?

00:42:59.679 --> 00:43:07.440
There was a whole bunch of organizing bins and shelves and shit that was a separate pile because they didn't get used.

00:43:08.000 --> 00:43:09.280
I've been trying to do this for forever.

00:43:09.440 --> 00:43:25.599
I'm like, yeah, so in terms of just adding a Christmas pile or separating it into a Christmas corner of junk, a Thanksgiving corner of junk, and a Halloween corner of junk, does that qualify as organization?

00:43:26.639 --> 00:43:29.599
And is that like a visual style?

00:43:30.079 --> 00:43:32.159
That's yes, and yes.

00:43:32.400 --> 00:43:41.119
Okay, because you need to okay, so and I will say I'm gonna go with she when you had to ask her where things were, she's like, I'll just do it my F and Cell.

00:43:41.440 --> 00:43:43.519
Yep, yep, you got it.

00:43:43.760 --> 00:43:46.800
Because in in our brains, I'll just do it.

00:43:46.880 --> 00:43:55.840
It'll take me less time to do it myself than have to explain it to you, and then everybody's feelings are heightened, and I'm mad because you said you'd help.

00:43:56.239 --> 00:43:56.880
Yes.

00:43:57.440 --> 00:44:01.920
So you I'm sorry, you aren't special, those aren't your alone feelings.

00:44:02.079 --> 00:44:08.639
You're you share that with a lot of people, but the visual like labeling makes it visual.

00:44:08.800 --> 00:44:19.039
If you have something giant, colorful, obvious, then it's labeled, which makes it a visual opportunity.

00:44:19.280 --> 00:44:24.079
Now, were the bins clear or solid?

00:44:24.559 --> 00:44:33.440
They were mixed, like so there was a set of clear and a set of solid, and like why are there two different kinds?

00:44:33.679 --> 00:44:36.159
Well, because right, yeah.

00:44:36.480 --> 00:44:44.000
So the the uh when you get container specific, yeah, if it's clear, it's visual, if it's solid, it's non-visual.

00:44:44.480 --> 00:44:45.039
Got it.

00:44:45.280 --> 00:44:59.679
Okay, but if you put a big old label, bright, colorful, happy, obvious, preferably on three sides, top, front, and side, yeah, saying this is mini Christmas trees, brilliant.

00:44:59.840 --> 00:45:04.880
You've now enabled the visual organizer to achieve that finding ability.

00:45:05.199 --> 00:45:08.559
Yeah, so yes, all of the above.

00:45:08.880 --> 00:45:09.760
All of the above.

00:45:09.920 --> 00:45:10.800
Got it, got it.

00:45:10.960 --> 00:45:19.440
Okay, now I don't want to spill the tea on the whole 3s method, but I know the first s is simplify.

00:45:19.760 --> 00:45:20.239
Yes.

00:45:20.559 --> 00:45:23.760
What does that look like in practice?

00:45:24.239 --> 00:45:32.639
So the definition of simplify, and I say definition because every month at the beginning of group, we cover a space.

00:45:32.960 --> 00:45:35.840
Okay, and so you have that constantly.

00:45:36.000 --> 00:45:41.199
When we simplify a space, we are decluttering anything that does not serve our current selves.

00:45:41.360 --> 00:45:55.199
We are not saving for the oh, I may get into that address one day, or oh, I really loved when the kids wore no current selves because we are not reading our books backwards, and we don't know that we're gonna make it till tomorrow.

00:45:55.440 --> 00:45:58.480
So it is the decluttering part of right now.

00:46:01.920 --> 00:46:02.960
Oh, okay.

00:46:03.119 --> 00:46:17.519
So LM family, if you didn't get that, it's decluttering for the current self, for the current condition, for who you are right now, not who you might be, who you aspire to be, who you remember you were.

00:46:18.000 --> 00:46:19.199
It's for right now.

00:46:19.280 --> 00:46:25.360
So what I'm interpreting is if I ain't gonna be using it this week, I need to be getting rid of it.

00:46:25.840 --> 00:46:26.159
Okay.

00:46:26.880 --> 00:46:27.199
No.

00:46:30.480 --> 00:46:32.719
You are pissing me off, sir.

00:46:34.559 --> 00:46:35.599
Because guess what?

00:46:35.760 --> 00:46:40.559
I'm not using my snow shovel this week, but I will in two months.

00:46:40.880 --> 00:46:41.199
Okay.

00:46:41.840 --> 00:46:44.559
So it's current season of life.

00:46:44.639 --> 00:46:48.079
I give myself a six-month window because that's our rotation, right?

00:46:48.400 --> 00:46:50.079
September is all about the office.

00:46:50.159 --> 00:46:55.119
We're moving into garage and outdoor stuff next, and then better bath and six-month rotation.

00:46:55.360 --> 00:47:06.559
Okay, so if I am working in my closet, yes, and I have decluttered everything done.

00:47:06.719 --> 00:47:10.400
I put on and I'm like, oh, I'm still fat, I take it back off, right?

00:47:12.639 --> 00:47:18.320
It's not getting a hanger back, but at that time, September, I've done my closet.

00:47:18.639 --> 00:47:20.639
I'm probably gonna flip on my hangers.

00:47:20.800 --> 00:47:27.599
So in six months, if that thing I was about, it does not get to say again.

00:47:28.400 --> 00:47:37.599
A lot of the time, if you're I will, especially in monthly group, we encourage a okay, it can live here for now for now being the thing.

00:47:37.679 --> 00:47:40.800
It may get an expire box if you're emptying the kitchen.

00:47:40.960 --> 00:47:45.840
Yeah, you put it in the garage, in the attic, in the trunk of your car, whatever it is.

00:47:46.079 --> 00:47:54.880
And in six months, when you're checking back in with that space and your little bring bring bring goes off, the box has not been opened.

00:47:55.199 --> 00:47:56.800
Guess what you don't need.

00:47:57.039 --> 00:47:58.400
Yes, yeah.

00:47:58.559 --> 00:48:00.320
So, no, not right.

00:48:00.400 --> 00:48:02.800
Well, I'm not using this today, I get to get rid of it.

00:48:03.039 --> 00:48:11.039
No, you cannot, but you do have to recognize and fully understand your current season and space of life.

00:48:11.280 --> 00:48:14.480
Yes, I love it because I just got rid of some shirts for that reason.

00:48:14.559 --> 00:48:19.280
Like they were 30 pound ago shirts, and I haven't worn them.

00:48:19.360 --> 00:48:34.960
I can't like when I butt the only good thing about those shirts is I don't have to iron them because when I put them on, I stretch out all the wrinkles, but they're a safety hazard because a button might pop off and shoot somebody in the eye.

00:48:35.679 --> 00:48:38.960
So I put them, I put them at the back of the closet.

00:48:39.039 --> 00:48:41.440
I said, Man, I'm gonna focus, I'm gonna work.

00:48:42.079 --> 00:48:43.519
It was a few weeks ago.

00:48:43.599 --> 00:48:47.280
I'm like, man, I gotta get rid of shirts.

00:48:47.360 --> 00:48:51.840
I'm just like, I ain't gonna be there, and they're like out of fashion, out of style.

00:48:52.000 --> 00:48:53.360
Just get rid of them.

00:48:54.000 --> 00:48:56.400
You have more important things to focus on.

00:48:56.559 --> 00:48:57.199
So I love that.

00:48:57.360 --> 00:48:58.639
I thank you for that explanation.

00:48:58.800 --> 00:49:00.800
Help people kind of understand that.

00:49:00.960 --> 00:49:08.800
So it sounds like I go in there for a season, yours is six months, and I imagine that's that can vary based on the person.

00:49:09.199 --> 00:49:11.760
Uh then there's a timeout or a trial segment.

00:49:11.840 --> 00:49:13.440
Okay, maybe not, but let's just put it over there.

00:49:13.519 --> 00:49:16.159
We'll check back in next time on the next cycle.

00:49:16.320 --> 00:49:23.840
And if it's still not relevant, not applicable, whatever, I get rid of it or not, and put it back into cycle, whatever that is.

00:49:24.400 --> 00:49:25.519
Can I tell you why?

00:49:25.679 --> 00:49:25.920
Yes.

00:49:26.079 --> 00:49:29.280
That is yes, and it's a big, it's a big why for me.

00:49:29.440 --> 00:49:32.239
It's like we talked about early, that mental clutter.

00:49:33.199 --> 00:49:42.719
If I go to my closet and I see my skinny Melissa dress that I'm gonna get back into one day, every day I see that, I'm like, that's so fast.

00:49:43.119 --> 00:49:47.920
Oh if you would have kept those shirts, you'd be like, Oh, maybe tomorrow.

00:49:48.079 --> 00:49:49.360
I'm not working hard enough.

00:49:49.440 --> 00:49:50.320
You are working hard enough.

00:49:50.400 --> 00:49:51.760
You're in high school anymore.

00:49:51.920 --> 00:49:52.719
Yep, yep.

00:49:52.960 --> 00:49:58.000
And it's part of that mental clutter that we're just issuing on ourselves that we don't need.

00:49:58.400 --> 00:49:59.360
Got it.

00:49:59.599 --> 00:50:03.760
So it's like keeping that is almost a form of abuse.

00:50:03.920 --> 00:50:12.639
Like I'm just flogging myself by keeping that front and center that adds to the stress, the mental clutter.

00:50:12.880 --> 00:50:13.280
Yep.

00:50:13.599 --> 00:50:14.400
Damn.

00:50:14.960 --> 00:50:16.800
But you're not a therapist.

00:50:18.800 --> 00:50:20.639
I don't get paid enough for that.

00:50:23.679 --> 00:50:25.599
My rates would be like, phew.

00:50:26.400 --> 00:50:27.280
Yeah, yeah.

00:50:27.440 --> 00:50:36.239
I know for a fact that this framework, this thinking is helpful, but it's like a lot of things, kind of like the book that you referenced earlier.

00:50:36.400 --> 00:50:39.119
I knew that was gonna help people, just not me.

00:50:42.719 --> 00:50:44.239
Oh my goodness.

00:50:44.800 --> 00:50:50.639
Okay, so are you ready for the grand slam closing question, Miss Melissa?

00:50:52.400 --> 00:50:56.239
Okay, so yes.

00:50:57.119 --> 00:51:01.679
Because I'm an overthinker, so of course I've been listening, so I'm like, how can I answer this correctly?

00:51:01.760 --> 00:51:02.880
So I'm ready.

00:51:03.280 --> 00:51:17.039
Good, and I know you're ready because I mean, you just told like your whole story of getting into organization, doing one-on-one coaching, helping people in your community, like it's clear that you are here to serve.

00:51:17.199 --> 00:51:25.760
And I mean, for real, you're like enhancing the quality of life for people, not just the people you work with, but the people in their space.

00:51:26.000 --> 00:51:29.360
And so, because of that, I know your answer is gonna be badass.

00:51:29.599 --> 00:51:35.840
So, here's the question What is the promise you are intended to be?

00:51:36.159 --> 00:51:38.079
A Disney princess.

00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:41.920
Mission accomplished.

00:51:47.039 --> 00:51:48.400
I could not screw with that.

00:51:48.639 --> 00:51:49.360
That was good.

00:51:50.159 --> 00:52:00.559
I think, I don't think, I promise to be better tomorrow than I am yesterday in the ship that we are.

00:52:01.199 --> 00:52:09.599
So we are friends, we are entrepreneurs, we are sometimes sassastic question, let's rise together ship.

00:52:09.760 --> 00:52:21.760
So I promise to call you out on the bullshit when you question yourself to help you grow as an entrepreneur, but also promise to be an arrow of a friend when you need it.

00:52:22.559 --> 00:52:31.440
Damn, I promise myself to continue working on going to the grave empty.

00:52:32.639 --> 00:52:39.920
I promise my community to meet me where you are, to oh, you need something that's under 10 bucks here.

00:52:40.000 --> 00:52:41.920
Oh, you need accountability here.

00:52:42.159 --> 00:52:46.079
You need me to understand your situation better, I'll get back with you.

00:52:46.320 --> 00:52:52.159
I promise my son that good luck, I'll save some back for your future therapy.

00:52:52.480 --> 00:52:57.039
You are covered in character, but also it's a safe space.

00:52:57.199 --> 00:52:59.199
Yeah, I promise my bestie.

00:52:59.440 --> 00:53:04.400
Okay, do you need a shovel, a fire pit, a ride?

00:53:04.639 --> 00:53:13.199
Like what however you need me to show up, I promise to show up how you need me to the best of my abilities on the day you call.

00:53:13.679 --> 00:53:16.239
Damn, mic drop.

00:53:16.719 --> 00:53:21.199
Did you have does that count?

00:53:21.440 --> 00:53:24.239
Oh my god, you freaking rocked it, sister.

00:53:25.039 --> 00:53:25.920
Well done.

00:53:26.159 --> 00:53:28.000
Was this fun, Miss Izzy?

00:53:28.559 --> 00:53:29.840
Dude, we always have fun.

00:53:30.000 --> 00:53:30.880
I know we do.

00:53:31.519 --> 00:53:33.679
You like a brother from another mother?

00:53:34.079 --> 00:53:35.199
Yeah, yeah, likewise.

00:53:36.320 --> 00:53:43.920
I forgot to ask this, but if people weren't in love with you before you answered the question, there's no doubt they're gonna say, Man, I gotta be in touch with Melissa.

00:53:44.239 --> 00:53:45.280
Where do we send them?

00:53:45.360 --> 00:53:50.559
Where's the best place for them to like get in contact with you and get more of your flavor?

00:53:50.880 --> 00:53:52.159
Honestly, the website.

00:53:52.400 --> 00:53:54.239
Okay, hopefulsimplicity.com.

00:53:54.320 --> 00:53:56.000
It's got links to the socials.

00:53:56.239 --> 00:54:00.239
So if you're an Instagram or Facebook person, you can find them all there.

00:54:00.400 --> 00:54:03.760
My email's there, the community information, everything is there.

00:54:04.159 --> 00:54:04.719
10-4.

00:54:04.960 --> 00:54:07.119
So hopefulsimplicity.com, folks.

00:54:07.280 --> 00:54:09.599
Hit up Melissa because she's awesome.

00:54:09.679 --> 00:54:18.239
And if you know people that organization is killing them and they need some simplicity in their life, Miss Melissa can help them out.

00:54:18.400 --> 00:54:21.119
Thank you for sticking it out all the way to the end.

00:54:21.280 --> 00:54:23.440
I know you got a whole lot of stuff going on.

00:54:23.599 --> 00:54:34.000
And in appreciation for the gift of time that you have given this episode, I want to offer you a free PDF of my book, Becoming the Promise You're Intended to Be.

00:54:34.159 --> 00:54:36.480
The link for that bad boy is down in the show notes.

00:54:36.639 --> 00:54:37.119
Hit it.

00:54:37.280 --> 00:54:39.119
You don't even have to give me your email address.

00:54:39.440 --> 00:54:40.239
There's a link in there.

00:54:40.320 --> 00:54:42.960
You just click that button, you can download the PDF.

00:54:43.280 --> 00:54:53.440
And if you share it with somebody that you know who might feel stuck or be caught up in self-destructive behaviors, that would be the ultimate.

00:54:53.679 --> 00:54:59.360
You sharing that increases the likelihood that it's gonna help one more person.

00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:08.159
And if it does help one more person, then you're contributing to me becoming the promise I am intended to be.

00:55:08.719 --> 00:55:12.800
Be kind to yourself, be cool, and we'll talk at you next time.